By Ben Bussey
Rock stars in movies have a somewhat chequered past. For every David Bowie in The Man Who Fell To Earth, there’s a Roger Daltrey in Vampirella; for every Mick Jagger in Performance, there’s a Mick Jagger in Freejack. The original wild child Iggy Pop doesn’t exactly have a spotless track record here either, given his few notable movie roles include Tank Girl and The Crow: City of Angels. Nonetheless, it’s only now, when he’s just a year shy of 70, that the iconic Stooges frontman has landed his first bona fide leading role – and it’s one which, when you read it, sounds like a promising idea.
Neo-noir Blood Orange casts the ageing rock star as, appropriately enough, an ageing rock star (this is implied at least, though given he’s fabulously wealthy, has tons of instruments and looks like Iggy fucking Pop, I don’t think there are many alternatives here). As the classic film noir format dictates, the wealthy old guy has a young trophy wife (Kacey Barnfield), a beautiful femme fatale who knows how to use what she’s got to get what she wants; and of course, the happy-ish couple soon get an unexpected visitor (Ben Lamb), in this case a figure from the wife’s past, to shatter their equilibrium.
Again, the idea of a contemporary take on film noir with Iggy Pop as the crumbling old man is not a disagreeable one at all, and clearly writer-director Toby Tobias (making his feature debut) was aiming to make a movie loaded with suspense, surprises and sex appeal. Unfortunately, Blood Orange falls well short on all counts. While it looks handsome enough and makes good use of an eye-catching desert villa in which almost the entire film is set, a combination of uninspired casting and subpar writing suck all the life out of proceedings before it even has a chance to get going.
The seemingly happy, clearly wealthy couple live a life of comfort, routine, and solitude; the old husband Bill goes out hunting in the desert or sits in his studio composing, whilst the trophy wife Isabelle seems to always be either swimming or sunbathing, only getting on the clock when she performs her old-fashioned wifely duties in the evening: cooking dinner, and sharing the bed. However, it becomes clear early on that the two have an understanding. Bill knows full well that Isabelle has designs on their handyman David (Antonio Magro); we too are well aware of this from the opening minutes in which she swims naked in front of him, and it seems her husband has no problem with her indulging her desires on the understanding that it’s all on a casual basis. However, the nature of their arrangement, and the stability of their relationship comes into question when they’re unexpectedly visited by Lucas (Ben Lamb), the son of Isabelle’s last husband. Yes, it seems our femme fatale is well-versed in being a trophy wife, and in that tradition she happily took all her last husband’s money following his death – whilst Lucas wasn’t left a penny. Naturally, Isabelle’s stepson (and, of course, ex-lover) isn’t happy about being denied the inheritance he deems rightfully his, and has come to demand his fair share. Isabelle seems eager to have Lucas out of their lives immediately, yet Bill strangely warms to the younger man, inviting him to stay on as a guest for a few days – in which time, the proverbial shit will be introduced to the proverbial fan.
While the core conceit is agreeable enough, Blood Orange takes very little time to get tedious. The plot just isn’t that surprising, and the deluge of dialogue-based scenes gets repetitive in no time at all. The key problem is, when a movie is centred on so small and ensemble, the performances need to be compelling – and they’re just not, at all. Fair play to Iggy, who seems to be enjoying himself, and with his gravelly voice and naturally sleazy demeanour he fits the part well enough; it’s the kind of role one could imagine the great Dennis Hopper playing if he were still with us. Meanwhile, Antonio Magro does fine in ostensibly the least demanding role as the largely taciturn handyman/boy-toy. But the real demands are on Ben Lamb and Kacey Barnfield, and while both of them may be pretty enough, neither of them are up to the job dramatically. Frankly, it doesn’t help that both actors are English, given the American setting and format, but the main problem is that there’s never any tangible emotional content; where there should be a hotbed of tension, both sexual and potentially murderous, all we have is – well – two people acting.
Not that Tobias does them too many favours as either director or writer. Again, the scenery is pretty enough, and the cinematography looks good, but the film runs out of ways to make it look interesting just as rapidly as the plot runs out of steam. Blood Orange would seem to have been made with a genuine affection for the classic noir format, and it might have worked had it been made with a whole lot more balls. As it is, it comes off every bit as bland, half-cocked and forgettable as that lousy DVD cover art would suggest. (And while we’re on the subject, that tagline ‘revenge has an enemy’ makes no sense whatsoever.)
Blood Orange is out on region 2 DVD on 11th July, from Metrodome.