Review: Gnaw (2008)
Distributors: 4 Digital Media (UK)
Directed by: Gregory Mandry
DVD Release date: 21st February 2011
Starring: Hiram Bleetman, Nigel Croft-Adams, Sara Dylan
Review by: Stephanie Scaife
I’m not sure why it’s taken so long for this to surface on DVD in the UK, having done the festival circuit for over 2 years then securing a Region 1 DVD release back in October 2009. Perhaps this has got something to do with it just not being very good and there being some kind of horror shaped gap in the release schedule, who knows.
So, imagine the most formulaic slasher film plot ever, give it the look and cast of a cheaply made ITV crime drama and this is what you’ve got here. It starts with a rather long-winded opening sequence involving a woman being pursued by our killer, apparently named Slaughterman, although I only learnt this after the fact by looking at the IMDB listing for the film. Then when I watched the making of on the DVD they apparently wanted to make him as iconic as Jason or Freddie. Clearly a massive fail on the part of the filmmakers due to me not realising that was what he was called and spending most of the film trying to figure out what he had on his face (a dead cat maybe?) and wondering why he even had a mask on as we all knew who he was pretty much from the beginning of the film anyway.
The set-up is fairly straightforward; 6 friends head off to a secluded cottage for a weekend away; the cottage is owned by Mrs. Obadiah, a batty old lady who seems to provide all of her guests with copious amounts of meaty goods; none of them seem to question this and soon tuck in. The characters are by the numbers stereotypes: we have the oversexed couple, the jackass and his ice queen girlfriend, a loner goth girl and the shy good guy who has a crush on her. Fairly soon they are figuring out that the meat pies are made from the previous guests who stayed at the cottage and that they are next on the menu.
For a film being branded as a horror comedy, this is neither, unless of course they are referring to the horrific dialogue which provides unintentional comedy throughout. But I kind of doubt that. There are also a few pointless story arcs that become completely irrelevant, such as the love triangle between the jackass and his girlfriend and the goth girl who it transpires *spoiler alert for anyone who cares* is pregnant with his child, it’s built up from the start as being something quite important but of course once most of them are dead it really doesn’t matter.
Despite the garish DVD cover there’s very little actual gore on show here, I’d guess due to budget restraints, and when it attempts to raise the tension it just falls flat. From start to finish Gnaw is entirely predictable, but on the plus side also mercifully short. As for extras there’s a short making-of and a rather pointless commentary both of which are more concerned with backslapping that being either informative or interesting. Definitely one to miss.