By Quin
Early in The Cabining, a group of people are critiquing screenplays. Writing partners and friends, Todd and Bruce, are there to get feedback on the horror movie they are writing. The consensus in the group is that it sucks. One woman chimes in with, “Just because you chose a forgiving genre, doesn’t make it okay to ignore all of the elements of screenwriting.” Perhaps ironically, this is the smartest bit of wisdom this horror/comedy has to offer. The Cabining isn’t bad, but it’s not that good either. It’s pretty much just so-so; and for a horror/comedy it is definitely neither funny nor scary.
Todd and Bruce want to write a horror script, but they are both out of ideas. Bruce shows Todd a flyer for a writing retreat in a remote location where a bunch of writers are going to help each other and the setting is supposed to get the creative juices flowing. The place where they are going is called Shangri-la – a reference to a great novel by James Hilton as well as one of my favorite Frank Capra films. When they arrive, there isn’t really a whole lot of writing going on. It’s mostly just people talking about writing and name dropping F. Scott Fitzgerald and quoting Shakespeare. However, Bruce admits to having never written a single word. When another guest asks him if he has ever written poetry, prose, a journal or even a blog, he replies, “No, I’m more of an observer.” But we know Bruce is just not that bright. He looks over Todd’s shoulder while he types away at the computer and then later boasts about how he wrote a whole page last night.
Eventually, and after a lot of boring and unfunny conversations, the guests of Shangri-la start dying. This kicks off an extremely lackadaisical police investigation, which is supposed to be humorous, and the guests pretty much just calmly keep doing what they’re already doing – which is not writing. There is a death by banana peel; and that should tell you exactly what kind of comedy you are going to get in The Cabining. It’s the low hanging fruit jokes, but the actors (Except for Bo Keister, who plays Bruce) play it all straight. The fact that they mostly played it straight was one of the things I liked about the film. But Keister’s silly performance as the macho buffoon is jarring and throws pretty much every scene way off.
The minimal amount of gore there is in the film is actually really great; the conclusion of the banana peel accident is gruesome and realistic. Unfortunately, the gore and the horror in The Cabining are pretty sparse. I’m not exactly certain if the director Steve Kopera was trying to make it even a little scary, as there is no building of tension and everything that happens we’ve seen before and can spot a mile away. Sure, it’s primarily a comedy, but there are almost no sight gags, which separates this from things like the Scary Movie franchise. The jokes come with the plot elements that we recognize as horror archetypes and through the dialogue. Some of the most successful comedic moments come when someone says something abstractly silly, like, “Poor Lacey. She died like a unicorn.” Honestly, I think I laughed once and chuckled maybe two more times.
The best thing about The Cabining is certainly not the title. It’s actually the direction, cinematography, sound design and score. When the opening credits rolled, it looked like it was going to be another Asylum-like film, but The Cabining looks and sounds great. The main theme even vaguely references the theme from The Shining, which I’m certain was on purpose. Most of the acting isn’t too shabby either. Luce Rains as Jasper is incredible. He hardly speaks, but he is amusing with that look on his face. He’s too good for this film, and elevates every scene he is in. There is also one familiar face in the film: Richard Riehle, one of those actors who has been in everything, is in The Cabining for one scene. He plays the uncle of one of the lead guys and he is a potential financier for their film. But he’s cranky and doesn’t think they have any talent. He’s right.
If you are a horror fan, you’ll probably want to skip The Cabining. I would have to say that it’s horror/comedy for non-horror fans and for people who are easily amused. Too bad it’s so well-made. It would be so much easier for me to completely disregard it if it looked as cheap as it felt.
The Cabining is available now for digital download from Indican Pictures.